Get smoked like dutches from the master

Uuuuugh no kitten yet. I did go to the westside shelter both Friday and Saturday morning but on Friday they were closed and on Saturday I still didn't have confirmation from Dee, so I went home empty-handed. Also, more difficulties with apparent new roommate allergies (she's allergic to some breeds of short-hair cats but doesn't know which one, and I know I don't want a long hair cat because, y'know, they've got long hair and get all sheddy and somehow I think are slightly less cute because there's literally more cat.) Long story short, even if I were to get a short-hair kitten I'd have to keep it in my room all the time to protect her allergies, that means litter box and cat food in my one room. A scent I experienced in Medford, and am happy to leave there. I was looking forward to keeping the litter box in the bathroom and its food dish in the kitchen (with my food dishes) but no such luck. *sigh* More will be revealed.

Thinking about the new roomie situation has given me pause to realize that I'm really sad Peter's leaving. I went to brunch with Dad and Michelle after rehearsal today (killer chinese chicken salad and a piece of Michelle's french toast) and Dad was asking whether or not I was feeling lonely these days, and without thinking about it I responded that I guess I didn't feel lonely because I had Peter and Kevin there. Even when I don't see them, at least I know that Peter was my family lifeline when I didn't talk to Mom, Dad or Kate in any given day (as though that ever happened). I just like knowing that he's across the hall, available to come re-wire my computer and television so when I turn off the light switch, my desk lamp turns off instead of my cable box. Without him here I know I'll still have Kevin to hang out with, but I'll feel a little more disconnected from my folks and have to do a little more active reaching out to make sure I'm not isolating.

I'm also totally shirking on the work Alecya asked me to do this week. I'm in second step territory again (we're aiming for a different spiritual experience this time...the fourth time) an in addition to the reading and step writing, she's asked me to begin every morning with the set-aside prayer (for which she's given me additional text that for some reason has proven impossible to memorize), followed by 20 minutes of unedited writing (or 3 full pages, whichever comes first), followed by 20 minutes (20!) of meditation, and 5 minutes of reflection. I've been copping out of all but the prayer with the excuse that a) I don't have a notebook to write in and b) I don't know how to meditate for that long. So I honestly haven't tried, and I just wanted to put it in writing for myself because I know I'm weening out here out of my own laziness and unwillingness to do the kind of work she's asking me to do. I know I shouldn't be whining about this but it requires me to get up an extra hour earlier than I otherwise would - that's more concentration that I have even doing something that I love! Ugh. It honestly feels like overkill just thinking about it. I guess I'm building a resentment about not being allowed to plow on through my 4th step, but maybe I'm just choosing to be cranky about that because its easier than acknowledging that I'm lazy and uninspired lately. Even spiritually disconnected. Feel like I'm going through the motions lately instead of really locking into it. Lately, I've felt most connected when working with Sarah, and its been about a week since we've sat down and gone through the book or her writing. God I hope she's doing okay in there. Maybe I need to start raising my hand when they ask for available sponsors. I guess I just don't feel available for much of anything lately.



And in other news...
Been watching these non-stop.

Part 1:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin1-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 2:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin2-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 3:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin3-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 4:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin4-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 5:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin5-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 6:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin6-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 7:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin7-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 8:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin8-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 9:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin9-11videoonCastTVVideoSearch.flv

Part 10:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin10-11videoonCastTVVideoSearc.flv

Part 11:
http://s31.photobucket.com/albums/c383/2medusa/?action=view¤t=HBOThin11-11videoonCastTVVideoSearc.flv